For the last four years, The Representation Project has used #AskHerMore on the red carpet to spotlight how our culture values women’s appearance over their accomplishments. This year we’re using #AskMoreOfHim to invite men to not only join the conversation, but also become allies in the movement for equality. We’re asking them to stand for women’s rights and end sexual harassment and violence against women. Over the next few weeks, we will be calling for others to join us and we will be releasing resources to empower men to become be better allies.
There is so much more that men can and must do to end sexism and violence against women. Until now, only a small number of them have been actively engaged in this effort. This must change. It’s time we #AskMoreOfHim.
10 THINGS MEN CAN DO TO PREVENT GENDER VIOLENCE
We all have a role in preventing violence. That’s why The Representation Project is proud to feature this list of “Ten Things Men Can Do to Prevent Gender Violence” by our friend and partner Dr. Jackson Katz.
1. Approach gender violence as a MEN’S issue
Approach sexual harrassment and forms of gender violence as a MEN’S issue involving men of all ages and socioeconomic, racial, and ethnic backgrounds. View men not only as perpetrators or possible offenders, but as empowered bystanders who can confront abusive peers.
2. Don’t Remain Silent
If a brother, friend, classmate, or teammate is abusing his female partner – or is disrespectful or abusive to girls and women in general – don’t look the other way. If you feel comfortable doing so, try to talk to him about it. Urge him to seek help. Or if you don’t know what to do, consult a friend, a parent, a professor, or a counselor. DON’T REMAIN SILENT.
3. Have the courage to look inward
Question your own attitudes. Don’t be defensive when something you do or say ends up hurting someone else. Try hard to understand how your own attitudes and actions might inadvertently perpetuate sexism and violence, and work toward changing them.
4. Ask If You Can Help
If you suspect that a woman close to you is being abused or has been sexually assaulted, gently ask if you can help.
5. Get Help
If you are emotionally, psychologically, physically, or sexually abusive to women, or have been in the past, seek professional help NOW.
6. Join the Cause
Be an ally to women who are working to end all forms of gender violence. Support the women whose courage and empowered voices have catalyzed the historic #MeToo movement. Attend “Take Back the Night” rallies and other public events. Raise money for community-based rape-crisis centers and battered women’s shelters. If you belong to a team, fraternity, or another student group, organize a fundraiser.
7. Be an Ally
Recognize and speak out against homophobia and gay-bashing. Discrimination and violence against LGBTQ people are wrong in and of themselves. This abuse also has direct links to sexism (e.g. the gender identity and sexual orientation of men who speak out against sexism is often questioned, a conscious or unconscious strategy intended to silence them. This is a key reason few men do so).
8. Educate Yourself
Attend programs, take courses, watch films, and read articles and books about multicultural masculinities, gender inequality, and the root causes of gender violence. Educate yourself and others about how larger social forces affect the conflicts between individual men and women.
9. Vote with your dollars and attention
Don’t fund sexism. Refuse to purchase any magazine, rent any video, subscribe to any website, or buy any music that portrays girls or women in a sexually degrading or abusive manner. Speak out about cyber-sexism and misogynist attacks against women on social media sites such as Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Reddit, etc. Protest sexism in new and old media.
10. Mentor Others
Mentor and teach young boys about how to be men in ways that don’t involve degrading or abusing girls and women (or men). Volunteer to work with gender violence prevention programs, including anti-sexist men’s programs. Lead by example.
This content was produced by MVP Strategies, a gender violence prevention education and training organization.
In partnership with actor, producer, and activist Justin Baldoni, Man Enough is a disruptive social movement ignited by a dinner conversation series that explores the heart of traditional masculinity in America. The mission of the show and the movement is to create a unique space where men, no matter their race, creed, sexual orientation and identity, political stance, or socio-economic status can come together to express their thoughts and feelings freely – something men have been socialized to cut off in America.
Man Enough invites all men to challenge the unwritten rules of traditional masculinity that have caused us to disconnect from one another, created the foundation of men’s violence against women and prevented us from taking the long journey from our heads to our hearts. Let’s hold ourselves and each other accountable to consciously taking part in this conversation, listening even when it gets uncomfortable, and making real changes in our lives to be better men tomorrow than we are today. You are Man Enough. Learn more.
The Mask You Live In follows boys and young men as they struggle to stay true to themselves while negotiating America’s narrow definition of masculinity. Learn more about the documentary now.
A primer for men who want to be allies by Michael Kimmel. Read the full article
Let's assume you want things to be better for everyone, you just literally do not know what to say. Well don’t worry, here are some remarks you can use.